# Sunday, 26 July 2009

Fun things to do with a leek – and you can eat them as well!

some leeks todayChana Liba was looking in the fridge for some fruit just now. Obviously confused, she asked “Hey, what’s that?

What’s what?” I replied (yeah, we have very deep conversations in our house!)

That big green thing that’s white on the end” she replied.

With all the intuition of a mother, I replied “It’s a leek.” (Shakespeare would have been sooooo jealous of dialogue like this :-))

As she was still looking rather blank, I asked “Do you know what it’s for?” which elicited a slow shake of the head.

I went over to the fridge, and removed the rather oversized leek from the shelf. Holding it carefully at the white end, I proceeded to thwack her gently on the tochus several times, whilst explaining that this was what a leek was for.

For some odd reason, this turned out to be the funniest thing she had experienced for some time, and she burst into uncontrollable fits of giggles. This of course encouraged me even more, and so began the Great Smile Gemach Leek Thwacking Event.

I chased her around the house, thwacking her whenever I could, whilst she tried (not very hard) to escape. After I was all puffed out, she grabbed the leek and started thwacking me! Shayna Brocho, not wishing to be outdone, grabbed it off her and started thwacking both of us. Simcha, not quite sure what the fun was all about, but not wishing to miss a moment, came hurtling down the hall after us, and the four of us ended up running around the house, and outside into the courtyard. Thwacking a few surprised-looking small children along the way, we made our way around the courtyard and back into the house, taking turns to grab the leek and get thwacking.

This went on for some time, until we all finally ran out of breath and flopped back in our chairs (we were supposed to be eating at this time). The leek, looking somewhat worse for the experience, went back into the fridge, and would have remained there, except that Shayna Brocho decided it was time for some more thwacking! She grabbed it and started bashing me over the bonce with it. This of course started the whole thing off again, resulting in several more rounds of leek thwacking.

By this time, several sections of leek had become somewhat detached from their original place of repose, and were used as secondary thwackers by those not in charge of the main instrument of thwackeration. This allowed Mummy and Nechoma Bryna to fall victim to the Zealous Leek Thwackers of Salford (or the Zltos as they didn’t become known).

Maybe this wasn’t what Hashem had in mind when He invented the leek, but it’s rare that four people can have so much fun for 70p! Visit your local supermarket and enquire about large sized leeks, you won’t regret it :-)

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