# Thursday, 19 April 2007

A moral story

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, playing golf - always something more important to me.

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush.

I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

Moral to this story : Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is the husband.

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# Wednesday, 18 April 2007

The dangers of late-night flits to Asda

Every year, right after the last Yom Tov of Pesach goes out, I zip off to Tesco (along with most of the rest of North Manchester's Jewish population) and stock up the cupboards. This year I decided not to. We were off to Leeds the day after, so we weren't in urgent need of chometz, and could do a shop on the way home.

Predictably, we stayed in Leeds longer than we should have, and didn't have time to go to Tesco on the way home. As they are open 24 hours, we decided to go later that night. Well, it looked like a plague of locusts had hit the place! There were long stretches of empty shelves, and the usually helpful Tesco people just laughed when I asked if they had any Corn Flakes. It seems that I was the 97th person to ask in the last five minutes. So, we did a minor bit of shopping, and decided to leave the rest for another day.

On the way out, I remembered that there is a big Asda just nearby, which is also open 24 hours. Never having been, we decided to go there and just buy a box of Corn Flakes and some Weetabix. Big mistake, it cost us 90 quid!

You see the problem is that Asda sells just everything! Not just food and stuff, but telephones, toys, clothes, cupboards and so on. Our local Tesco sells some of this as well, but not as much. We really got carried away!

Trouble was, we enjoyed it so much that we've been back several times since! These late-night flits are getting expensive!

Ho hum, the cost of living eh?

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Simcha at 12 and a half months

I know I've been a bit lazy about updating this blog, but here's something to prove that I do add entries sometimes :-)

The day after Pesach, we took a PSG trip to Leeds to see Grandma and Grandpa's new flat. Whilst we were there, Simcha had a go at sitting in an ornate carved wooden chair they have. The result was just too scrummy to keep to ourselves...

Hopefully more regular updates, jokes and pictures will hit this blog... but don't hold your breath!

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# Wednesday, 21 March 2007

My daughter the literary genius

Simcha now has a huge vocabulary of high quality words. She can say "bup bup," which means "Please pick me up" as well as, erm, well not much else really!

Still, we think she's a genius.

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# Tuesday, 13 March 2007

Who says the art of fine writing is dead?

Apparently, the following quote appeared in the Washington Post. As usual, I no responsibility for the accuracy of this claim, but I hope it's true!

"...its like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer."

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# Wednesday, 07 March 2007

Great site - how to build almost anything

I just came across a great site that tells you how to build almost anything. I found instructions for how to build a Jacob's Ladder (great toy that fascinates the adults too), a match rocket and loads more. See it for yourself.

Have fun!

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From Horseshoe Crab to Formula One in two weeks - Simcha update

Having commented on Simcha's similarity to a Horseshoe Crab, at least in terms of her inability to roll over, she has made remarkable progress in the last two weeks.

We first noticed that something had changed when she was found sitting up in her cot one morning. Given that she sleeps on her back, she much have rolled over to sit herself up. This was purely conjecture for almost a week, until we spotted her in action.

Since then she has come on in leaps and bounds. She now walks around the furniture quite fast, and whizzes up and down the room using a baby walker, reminiscent of a Formula One driver. She hasn't yet figured out how to turn, so she hits the wall at the end of the room and looks around for help until some kind soul turns her around, but her speed is quite impressive.

I know, in no time at all she'll be getting married and we'll be wondering where the time went!

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Nice one from English Heritage

Anyone living in England must have seen the blue signs that the English Heritage put up indicating places of (questionable) interest. I have no idea if this one is real or a clever piece of image manipulation, but I thought it was lovely!

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# Monday, 12 February 2007

Am I stupid or are they?

Seen on the web site of a telephone provider just now...

"Broadband free for first 6 months, thereafter no extra charge

Go on someone, explain that one!

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